Incuvious Cratin
by SYM803
Summary: Malfoy's best friend Incuvious gets sorted into Gryfindor...
1. prlogue

Incuvious Cratin

By Sym803

Prologue   
  
  


It all started with a knock on the door. 

"Incuvious, Draco's at the door." 

"For goodness sakes mother Malfoy has been my friend for 9 years, get it strait, it's Malfoy. I have been your son for 11 years my name is Cratin!"

 He said walking towards the door 

"But son, what's wrong with Incuvious? It's your father's grandfather's name." 

"Why would I want to be named after him? He was a  squib. Besides, Who the heck wants to go around with the name Incuvious?" 

"Well Cratin is from your great grandfather." 

"Well, it's from my father too." 

"Have a good time In- Cratin!!!" 

"Cratin, What took you so long to get out here?" Malfoy asked, 

"It's all Incuvious's fault," Cratin said and the two headed off for Diagon ally.  
  
  
  
_Please keep reading my story this is not the end. DO NOT forget to review. Otherwise Incuvious will get you. Incuvious is pronounced (In-que- vee-us)_

At Hogwarts:

 "The sorting ceremony is about to begin." Professor McGonagall said as she led the kids into the great hall. 

There was a stool with a hat sitting on it. "When I call 

your name please come up and put the hat on your 

head. " 

"Draco Malfoy" Before Malfoy even had the hat on his 

head it called out "Slytherin" 

"Hermione Granger" "Gryffindor" called the hat 

"Carol Pinkerston" "Hufflepuff" 

"Harry Potter" Suddenly the Great Hall was full of whispering and pointing. '_Oh please'_ Incuvious thought "Gryffindor" \

"Incuvious Cratin" Please put me in Slytherin Cratin thought "You would do much better in Gryffindor" The hat said shouting "Gryffindor" out loud.

Dun dun dun… what will happen now that Incuvious (Draco's **Best friend)is in Gryffindor. (Of all houses I put him in **Gryffindor** ) What has gotten into my head, I must be going crazy.**

Oh well enjoy J

**DO NOT FORGET TO REVIEW**

That's what the box is for 

-_Sym803_  
  
  



	2. chapter1: the plan

"WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?", Incuvious exclaimed so loudly that it was heard in the muggle world.

Incuvious ripped the sorting hat! 

"Well maybe you won't have to be in Gryffindor!" Professor McGonagall said. 

"Come with me to the Headmasters office. Dumbledore will want to see you, she said shapely.  
  
  


"It's just a hat", Incuvious said. 

"Just a hat! Just a hat! This has been the sorting hat since it was open!" said Dumbledore who just entered the room because of all the screaming. 

You shall be in Gryffindor and you will mend the hat".  
  
  
  
"Boy that kid's taken it seriously" Ron said to Harry. "I wonder what house he wanted to be in?" 

"Probably Slytherin by the way he acted", Harry replied eyes fixed on Incuvious. 

Just then Incuvious sat down next to Harry. 

"I'm only sitting with you because that stupid hat put me here, and then Dumbledore agreed. I should be with Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle, but to make him happy I'll be friends with you!" 

Just then Malfoy came to the Gryffindor table. "Well if it isn't Harry Potter!" Malfoy said furiously. "I see you made a friend with Harry Potter. Oh, and there's Weasley. See you've got a trio if I'm not mistaken." 

"Malfoy I have to speak to you privately" Incuvious said ushering Malfoy to a corner. 

"We could get dirt on Potter and that Weasel kid. Here's what I was thinking. I could spy on him, and he won't have the slightest idea what hit him." 

"Great plan. I could do the black-mail. Just make sure to make up every thing. We'll meet up here once a day," whispered Malfoy. 

When the feast was over, Harry, Ron, and Incuvious went to Gryffindor Tower and to the common room. There they told each other their life-story. 

"Maybe I took the ceremony to seriously," Incuvious said embarrassed. 

"Probably, you made a fool out of your self," said Ron.

The next day at Potions Incuvious and Malfoy planned out the secret plan. 

"I think I should be all -"you saved the world from you- know who"-ish so he won't suspect a thing. I mean so far he believes every one of my crazy lies," Incuvious said giving himself a pat on the back. 

"Good. They're taking the bate. Now we have to real them in. Got any ideas?" Malfoy asked.  
  
"Yeah, but they might not be any good," Incuvious began. 

"What I do is form a trio. We do almost everything together. Then when they least expect it I disappear momentarily, and you cause trouble. I can tell you where they plan to be, so you know what to do and when and where to do it. When they ask where I was, I say studying, my mom hates for me to get lower than the best." Incuvious replied, 

"Good plan, the excuse was a bit corny, but I can't think of anything better. Unless we want to blow our cover, then I have plenty." 

"We don't want to blow our cover, I have to survive seven years with them, unless we kill them first," Incuvious said thoughtfully. 

"Great idea Cratin, I like the way you think. Killing Potter sounds fun, got any ideas?" Malfoy asked. 

"Yeah, not to get expelled. Pranks are safer!" Incuvious mumbled since his mother wouldn't let him live it down if he got expelled. 

"We'll meet up in the owlry after dinner. This ought to be good," Malfoy finished while gloating.

a/n REVIEW!!!!!!! Now!!!! NO FLAMES, or else I will use them to burn you at the stake bwahahahahaha. I think I'm looooosing my mind, I have to go find it, tatatatata…ta J


	3. Action

       "Let's go to the Gryffindor Common Room and talk while everybody's in The Great Hall," Harry suggested. 

"I can't," Incuvious said. "My mom said I have to study 3 times daily."

"I'll come with you," Hermione volunteered. "I could use the extra study time.

"Are you two coming?" Incuvious asked Harry and Ron.

"No," Harry answered for both of them.

"Okay. I want to get a little food on my way. Hermione, please save me a table at the library, Incuvious said.

       When Incuvious got to the Great Hall "To Get Food," he was really going to announce to Draco to start the plan. 

"Malfoy," Incuvious whispered, "Lets get this plan started. Bring some Mashed Potatoes and gravy to the Gryffindor common room. Luckily, I got an invisibility cloche for my birthday. You can use it. The password is "_Pig Snout."_

 "Okay," Malfoy said. "I have a better idea." Lets black mail Neville. We'll say, "We'll tell your grandmother your doing so bad in charms." I'll do it, and I'll push Neville out of the cloak, and he'll get blamed."

"Good adjustment," Incuvious said.

       Meanwhile, Ron said, "Gee, I wonder why Cratin didn't want to hang out with us-

Just then someone entered the common room. When Harry and Ron looked up, they saw nothing. "Hmmm…  How could that be? Unless someone owns an invisibility cloak, it must be my imagination." Ron was thinking out loud.

 Just then… Splat. All over them was mashed potatoes and gravy. 

"Yuck," Ron shouted. "I hate gravy." 

Just then, both of the boys saw a figure. They were able to make it out it was Neville!

       "Why would Neville do something like that?" asked Harry to Ron. 

"I don't know, why don't we ask him, Ron replied.

"No," said Harry. "You know Neville, he won't admit it."

Ron replied, "Yeah, I agree. Why don't we just forget about it?"

"No, we'll tell Dumbledore," Harry answered.

"Okay, " Ron agreed.  

       Ooooooooo what will Dumbledore do? You'll have to wait until writers block goes on vacation. Meanwhile go read my sister's story **The Phantom Phoenix **by **_PhantomTzipora (_** **_)_**it's really good.     Don't forget to review!! (My story and her story)


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